The most common mistake new cup users make is pushing the cup in too far. People who have used tampons expect the cup to sit high, near the cervix. A menstrual cup works the other way round: it sits low, just inside the vaginal opening. Get the depth right and most problems with leaks, pain and opening go away.
This guide explains how far a menstrual cup should go in, how to tell when it has opened, what to do when it won't open or won't go in, and how to insert it without pain. If you are still choosing a cup, start with the Pee Safe menstrual cup range: a soft, small cup makes insertion much easier.
Quick answer: how deep should a menstrual cup go?
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A menstrual cup sits low in the vaginal canal, lower than a tampon. The rim sits a few centimetres in and the base sits just inside the opening.
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The whole cup and stem should be inside your body, with the base of the cup about one fingertip's depth from the opening.
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The cup must sit below your cervix, not above it. If your cervix is low, it is fine for it to sit slightly inside the cup.
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If you can feel it when you sit or walk, nudge it up slightly, trim the stem or try a different size.
The exact depth depends on your body. An MRI study of 28 women, published in Human Reproduction in 2006, found the distance from the vaginal opening to the cervix averaged about 63 mm, with the longest more than double the shortest. That is why the right depth is "low, below your cervix", not a fixed number.
Where a menstrual cup sits: cup vs tampon
|
Tampon |
Menstrual cup |
|
|---|---|---|
|
Position |
High, near the cervix |
Low, a few centimetres inside the opening |
|
How it stays in |
Held by the vaginal walls higher up |
A gentle seal against the vaginal walls lower down |
|
Common mistake |
Not pushed far enough |
Pushed too far, towards the cervix |
When a cup sits too high, it can fold under the cervix, sit at an angle and leak. It is also harder to reach and remove. When it sits too low, the stem pokes out and rubs. The right spot is in between: low enough to reach easily, high enough that you cannot feel it.
How far to insert, by cervix height
|
Your cervix |
How to tell |
Where the cup goes |
|---|---|---|
|
Low |
You touch it at your first knuckle |
Very low; the cervix may sit slightly inside the cup, which is fine. Trim the stem fully. |
|
Average |
You touch it around your second knuckle |
Low, with the full cup below the cervix |
|
High |
You can barely reach it, or not at all |
Low, as usual; it may move up a little through the day. Keep the full stem for removal. |
To measure your cervix height in millimetres, follow the finger test in our menstrual cup size chart guide.
How to insert a menstrual cup without it hurting
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Pick a calm moment. Try for the first time at home, on day 2 or 3 of your period, when you have time and are naturally lubricated.
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Wet the cup with water, or use a little water-based lubricant. Never use oil-based products, which can damage silicone.
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Choose a small fold. The punch-down fold makes the smallest tip and is the gentlest. The C-fold is the easiest to learn.
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Get into a squat, or sit on the toilet with your knees apart, or stand with one foot on the toilet seat.
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Breathe out slowly and relax your pelvic floor, as if you were about to pee. Tight muscles are the main cause of pain.
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Aim back, not up. Point the folded cup towards your tailbone, not towards your belly button. The vaginal canal angles backwards.
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Insert it about a finger's length or less, then let go. The cup should open on its own.
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Push the stem up until it is fully inside, so nothing pokes out.
For the full step-by-step with folds, see how to use a menstrual cup for beginners.
How to tell if your menstrual cup is open
A cup that has not fully opened will leak, so always check after inserting. Use any of these four checks:
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The rotate test. Hold the base of the cup (not the stem) and turn it gently. If it turns smoothly in one piece, it has opened. If it feels stuck or folds further, it has not.
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The finger sweep. Slide a clean finger along the outside of the cup, all the way round. A fully open cup feels smooth and round. A dent or a fold means part of it has not popped open.
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The tug test. Pull the stem very gently. If you feel resistance, the cup has sealed. If it slides down easily, it has not.
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The pop. Many people feel or hear a soft pop as the cup springs open. Not feeling it does not mean it failed, so do one of the checks above too.
Why is my menstrual cup not opening inside?
|
Likely cause |
Why it happens |
What to try |
|---|---|---|
|
The fold is too tight |
Some folds, like the punch-down, hold their shape |
Switch to the C-fold, which opens more readily, or let go a little sooner |
|
The cup is too soft for your muscles |
Strong pelvic floor muscles can hold a soft cup closed |
Try a slightly firmer cup or a smaller size |
|
The cup is too big |
There is not enough room for it to unfold |
Try a smaller size |
|
It is too high |
It is pressed against the cervix and cannot spread out |
Pull it slightly lower and let it open there |
|
Your muscles are tense |
Clenching squeezes the cup shut |
Breathe out, relax, and try again in a few minutes |
Quick fixes when it will not open:
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Hold the base and rotate the cup a full turn.
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Gently press the vaginal wall next to the cup with a finger. This lets air in so the cup can open.
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Do a few squats or Kegel squeezes and releases with the cup in place.
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Take it out, rinse it and try again with a different fold.
If leaks continue even once the cup is open, see 7 common reasons menstrual cups leak.
Why can't I insert my menstrual cup?
If the cup will not go in at all, one of these is usually the reason:
|
Cause |
Signs |
Fix |
|---|---|---|
|
Tense muscles |
You are nervous, holding your breath or clenching |
Breathe out slowly, relax your belly and pelvic floor, and try again later |
|
Dryness |
It drags or stings at the opening |
Wet the cup, or use a water-based lubricant; try on a heavier flow day |
|
Wrong angle |
It hits a wall straight away |
Aim towards your tailbone, not upwards |
|
Fold too wide |
The folded tip is still bulky |
Use the punch-down or 7-fold for a smaller tip |
|
Cup too big |
Even a tight fold feels too wide |
Try a small cup |
|
Wrong position |
Standing straight makes it awkward |
Squat deeply or put one foot up on the toilet seat |
When it may be something more
Some people find that their vaginal muscles tighten on their own whenever they try to insert anything, even when they want to and are relaxed. The UK's NHS describes this as vaginismus: an automatic reaction you cannot control, often with a burning or stinging feeling. It is common, it is not your fault, and it is treatable. Treatment usually involves relaxation and pelvic floor exercises, and many people see progress within weeks.
See a gynaecologist if you cannot insert a cup or tampon after several calm tries, if insertion causes sharp pain, or if you feel a blockage. Rarely, an unusual hymen shape can block insertion, and a doctor can check this quickly.
Do menstrual cups hurt the first time?
A menstrual cup should not hurt, even the first time. It is normal for it to feel strange, and you may feel some pressure while you learn. Sharp pain is not normal: stop, take the cup out and try again later.
Mild discomfort usually comes from:
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tense muscles during insertion
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the cup sitting too low, so the stem rubs
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the cup not having fully opened
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a cup that is too big or too firm for you
Once it is in the right place, you should not feel it at all. If you can, adjust the depth, trim the stem or try a smaller, softer cup. Most people find the first two or three periods are a learning curve. A 2019 review in The Lancet Public Health found new users needed a few cycles to get used to cups, and that about 7 in 10 wanted to keep using one once they had.
If you are worried about your first time and virginity, read do menstrual cups affect your virginity.
Get the depth right, and the rest follows
When a menstrual cup sits low, below your cervix, and fully opens, it seals well, does not leak and cannot be felt. If yours will not go in or will not open, check your muscles, your fold, your angle and your size before giving up. Most problems are solved within two or three periods.
If your cup feels too big or too firm, a smaller, softer cup can make all the difference. Browse the Pee Safe menstrual cup range to find your size.
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